Sunday

Did you forget that I am NOT WEAK?

Out to Pasture
fter a shit storm last night of Dana and Dad abusing me verbally and terrorizing me I have really had ENOUGH. I have no ability to deman respect unless the both of them are getting my paycheck. I want to leave here and free myszelf. Why did I EVER come back here. I wish I stayed in NY and noone could control and manipulate me. But Nooo thought I would have a dog and garden and some PEACE. Kep this rotted old house for DAD by paying the taxes ( is what it comes out to)and get to live alone, and help him out. Not going ot be a MARTYR here but I DO and have done A LOT for him. NOPE sorry you are subjected to taunting ridiculing berating put downs and yelling slamming doors and you are tortured and terroized MORE when you make a stand, fight back and or then lock OUT hang UP avoid etc... They want you WEAK unless your strength directly benefits them
.I was pushed last night so muych that after 5 years of it I fought back I pounded him in the arm said I was calling the police I have had ENOUGH and he took my phone, continued threatening he would SMASH my computer too, etc while I was irate crying up all night by the way ALL broken out he was taking PICTURED og my freak out saying how ( THE usual) MENTALLY FUCKING ILL I am etc...I grabbed and threw it on the floor and he lunged at mean I side kicked him right in the leg and puch him as hard as I could and said get OUT of my room NOW. I aksed you for an hour and let me finish what I am DOING. I asked you to stop and you not only continued as usual but went and GOT MY DAD over to beat me verbally together in this 2 room apt.....
OVER 150.00 being days 3 days late for my DAD.
So he can go the the bar overeat and have his booze. DAna helped me pay ONE bill and I owe him roughly 70.00
YUP
I am SICK of being picked on buullied and used by the people that are supposed to love me.
I now understand why dad's mother killed herself, sometimes you have nowhere to go.

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