I am copying my comment on the blog and thank Eli for divinely intervening in my impulse to help myself to money I found in the house that I need.. and for ever stealing a Starbucks CD.
Thank you for writing this post because I REALLY NEEDED to read it this morning.
My SO has locked his office, I am sans job, and I found the poker stash.... WOW what a freakin trip down trigger lane this is..
I am going to NOT locate they key..... justify and tear apart bank bags of change and bills as I need gas and cigarettes.
He, was humming his catchy passive aggressive ditty in the shower thihe is not musical OR poetic consisting of some insults in the key of B major as in bitchin b/c he needs to be relieved of the bondage of semen) Seriously?? We are HERE? At MR AA's 17 year Anniversary?
We still do not know how to say 'I feel ( depraved, resentful, etc etc) or worse I want to go upstairs, do you? Is this difficult? Instead I witness tantrum and remain on laptop in front of fireplace and let him stomp himself to bed) And I not only do not care, indulge or go to the argument I wish I had a lesson other than this one today. I wish I could be at home in my apt with heat and running water...and the smoke soot was GONE and my environment was mine to control.
See how this could be a perfect set up for me to go in there and raid those money bags? I mean ten bucks for gas and butts... He would NEVER notice ...
Why it is not in a safe and why I am not privy to the facts is another blog post...
The first day I am out of money in the 6 years I have known him....
and I found a nice guy that does not share.. Entitlement, his FLUID level , my need to be cherished and adored, money (fear doubt insecurity) ........... can anyone tell me what this has to do with one day at a time not using and loving one anther through it all with a HP?