letter to a friend

preface we wer not talking for a long long time

we ran the streets in Cambridge as teens and prep school we had a fun time on xtc acid then as adults, lots of the x and then  came the white album...He is an art director and I was in sales in telcom then after Sales at Tiffany's.  We were together when my mom died in nyc and that same day I tossed his needles in the garbage, and he detoxed before I buried her. He was a BIG  part of my development, both in  active years and then my sober years always encouraging me to be more and we last shared a place on E 74rthst and I left b/c I missed my little niece and NH and he and I fought over the amount of mtgs I was going to as I remember it, I feared he was pre or in relapse and I was ruining my cahnces of staying sober. I threw everything in the honda crx and cruised  back to NH. Then I ws mad bc he told all HS friends I was crazy. Whatever  I love this guy like a brother, and wanted to save my note as a brief synopsis of where we are today.

I would be mad at you for making me live in LA too. Working in commercials is exhausting.
I cannot imagine what it is like. Going anywhere is not happenin'. I try not to feel like sorry for my pathetic lot in life. I am employed but it seems like I make enough to get to and from my cubicle job and not much else. And this is HUGE....I have stayed in one place for 8 years ALONE( !>?) me... so though I feel enslaved and bitch on my blog that I cannot DO anything ever fun, I hate being poor and struggling, I hate paying rent while doing all of the property maintenance here with this insanity. and HOW I wish I could get the f outta here and see PPL.. He and I are butting heads on this as he is provided GOOD expensive organic coffee, maid service, dump and recycling 50 acres of SHRUB LAWN and dog shit care, and all kinds of benefits on me.. Little things I share with Dad always have, began to add up when I had to pay to fix my own ceiling and attempt MOLD removal with NO CLUE..I have been ill in my sinus for sooo long and finally discovered WHY. I am glad I have no kids I am torturing just spoiled dogs. And my dad... next door.. I keep baking sweets yet that his insulin continues to keep him going.. ( jking of course) I love him and deal with the bs b/c he cannot play piano anymore with the Dupetryn's...apparently he cannot run the vacuum cleaner either. Are you in contact with your Dad at all? How is your Mom? 
I love you Nick! I am sorry you found me crazy and or I subjected you to my unrest. I got my 14 yr chip and still need much of what the program provides but I cannot embrace any Christianity like concepts.

When you have time check out the link to my friend's documentary Oxymorons they shot it in Somerville it is really good. 

What else to make you laugh... I took up gambling, it bet prostitution I smoke a pack a day stopped working out, but have a full head of brows and lashes for like 8 consecutive months. And I am THIN. ( ish)
Thank you to online gaming and farmville.
I did well last fall too playing Hold 'em poker on ultimate bet,online, but cannot seem to repeat the performance. I keep choking, but it does occupy my fingers and keep my ocd at bay:-) I took a six month hiatus and won 12 bucks yesterday from a  buck woo hoo.
You know you are so very very special ( friend I wrote to) I hope you are able to write, if you ever have any down time if only for yourself. Remember this on those long hard days when you get home to dogs that cannot fathom how hard it is to provide for them with their damn panting whiny faces ;-0 It beats paying for a teenagers cell phone bill and clothing and having college money anxieties ALL DAY LONG :-) And in your case ALIMONY good riddance bitch!

F- that!

1 comment:

  1. I paid a teens cell phone recently...not good, what to they talk and text ALL day ??LOL Nice post !